Word Nerd help needed

Actually, language nerd help, I think. Specifically, spoken language.

My carpool buddy asked me this morning what the “rule” is for when to use “the” (”thuh”) and when to use “the” (”thee”) in speech. I couldn’t give a definitive answer, so I’m going to ask my language/linguistics geek friends for help. What is the answer? Is there one? It seems like speechwriters might know the right way to use it.

John!

This is my husband, John. You’ve all read my babbling about him. I love him.

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Edit: Posted using my camera phone– I have to remember to add two dashes at the end of any post; Verizon adds spam to outgoing mail, apparently. LiveJournal rocks my socks.