The Ballad of Captain Orva
17-Apr-03
This is…. doggerel…. I wrote it for my campaign, in reference to the game we played a couple of weeks ago.
Orva was the Captain of our mighty ship
We’d sailed for weeks without a single slip.
Except for the plague that took our old crew,
Our first mate, nav’gator, and captain too.
Yet Orva took on the role we all were fearing
Required prayers, and made us all stop leering.
Though we’re a scurvy, salty-dog lot
At least Captain Orva showed us what we’ve got.
Hardly anyone knew we’d gone off our course.
We’re on a ship, ye know, not a bloody ‘orse!
And them mutt’rings below are of no account
Our Capt’n’s a paladin, whom no fear can daunt!
One day we docked at a strange isle
Quite small and jungled, no more’n a mile.
We trekked in to find, much to our horror
The island was occupied by pygmies and more!
For these savages worship’d some ancient god
Some forbidden Thing with symbols odd.
We burnt the altars, destroyed them all
And sailed far away, our masts mighty tall.
Oh, pity us, then, who quickly halted
When the winds died upon our sails so salted.
We grouched at the Capt’n’s orders clear–
“Wash everything twice! To keep out the fear.”
But little she knew of the false, false friend.
One who was set to bring Orva’s end!
Her own steersman, someone she did trust–
She didn’t know the evil beneath that sweet crust.
Till late one night, when our Captain did hear
Singing and chanting, words that brought fear.
She sought the source of such wicked ways–
And found a cult that had been there for days!
At the center of the dastardly group,
Her own friend Kemen, played her for a dupe!
They clashed and clanged, till each cultist fell
But Kemen they captured, may she burn in hell!
But what illusion or dream do we see now at dawn?
A ghostly ship gliding, by no earthly winds drawn.
Its sails were tattered, its mast– what a sight!
For all of the masts and decks were bleached white.
Rusty weapons were spied mounted for and aft
Our Captain gazed on them, and mighty she laugh’d.
For no ghostly ship could deter her through fear.
No matter what fate might be lurking near.
They mounted the ghost ship, her deck so pristeen.
Descended the stairs– how white did they gleam!
In the first mate’s cabin she found, all unplann’d,
Six journals of woe– writ in her very own hand.
Yet lower into the dark decks unseen
They climbed down slowly, for the decks did gleam.
Yet inside the lowest hold they did find
A door most curious, not to be left behind.
Beneath a layer of dust and sea-grime
A door in the floor, awaiting its time.
They stopped to discuss, these heroes true,
In the end deciding, there was but one thing to do.
Opened the door and descended the ladder
Though what did they find– what was the matter?
A hideous creature from planes yet unknown
It spoke to them harsh, turned minds gainst their own.
Also in that hollow and harrowed hole
They found the ship’s crew– alive, but no soul.
A sigil she treaded, our Captain so brave,
Then the floor moved to grab her– her blood it did crave!
The beast rended her friend, broken body and mind,
And turned ‘pon the other, to treat in like kind.
As it shattered her comrades, one by one,
It focused its might on her bond with the Sun.
And to that bond it gave a sharp CRACK
Splitting her from Pelor with one mighty SNAP!
That which kept sanity with her was gone–
It splintered and shattered her most divine bond.
The hull did open, a gap wide and deep
Captain Orva slid down, preferring to sleep.
And so with a mighty splash she fell
Into the deep waters, her path straight to hell.
Poor Orva our Captain, we saw never more
No body recovered, no blood and no gore.
But this I have heard round the fire and cup–
Her story did end at “Orva! WAKE UP!”