Mortaine’s Blog

Oooh, she’s gonna be mad at me for posting these!

Note: You can’t see it in the pics, but there’s a little white brim on the hat, and a white pompom that Mom can take off if she ever wants to (and no, I would not be offended– I wouldn’t even know, for crying out loud!)

My sister called earlier today because she read my journal entry about the nightmare and the grabbing, and wanted to make sure I was doing okay.

I am doing okay. This is, literally, the best I will ever be. It’s not perfect, but it’s okay. The fact that I know I won’t be so jumpy tomorrow is what makes today okay. The fact that I know exactly why I’m jumpy and what to do or say to make it okay is what makes it okay. I’m self-aware of my problems. I’m awake to my own psyche. And, frankly, this is the me I have to live in, so I might as well make the most of it.

Thanks, everyone, who has sent love and fond thoughts my way today. This was not a terrible day, but it was a bit rough, and I appreciate everyone’s love and support.

In unrelated news…..

I finished the hat for my sister’s daughter today.

Yep. It might actually be too small. If so, I’ll know how big to make the next one. It’s supposed to be a little beret. Well, it was supposed to be a bonnet, but it ended up as a beret.

And yes, the only thing I have in the house even remotely child-head-sized is my dog’s stuffed bear.

Yes, that’s Hammer’s bear.

Don’t ask.