Mortaine’s Blog

I wanted to go to a fish store today to look at bettas, with the possible undecided plan of maybe getting one for my cubicle.

So, I searched for an aquarium store, someplace specifically catering to fish-keepers, download and print directions, and on my lunch hour, I head out.

The place is less than 9 miles away. I printed the “avoid freeway” directions because I didn’t feel like dealing with freeway traffic.

Unfortunately, this meant I spent about 10 minutes parked at the stoplight just before the airport. Because the far left lane turns left, away from the airport, and people are too fucking stupid to realize this from the signs and basically fuck up traffic cutting into the other left turn lane. Bastards. Also, there is now one way to approach the airport, so there are about 4 times as many cars as the roads were designed to handle.

And I get going on the next leg of my trip, my blood pressure rising with every stop light, and there is no fucking way to turn right onto Hedding. There’s a detour, but it goes off to the left. Fuckers. Fuck ‘em for blocking off the street, and fuck Mapquest for not knowing about the construction that’s been going on for 2 1/2 years!

Fuck.

I get all the way down to where I was trying to go and realize that I really don’t know that I want to even go in. You know how you get that feeling that something’s not right about a place? I mean, the sign outside was rusted. The blinds were closed (which makes a certain amount of sense for regulating tank temps). I had this general sense of “secret import/export smuggling shop in the backroom that you don’t know about” when I pulled into hte driveway.

So I left. At this point, I have about 10 minutes left in my lunch hour, so I stop at 7-11 and buy hot dogs and cookies for my lunch (oh, yum). Yes, I am guaranteed to regret this later, as the hot dogs weren’t really even red, more of a ruddy brown with a very slight greenish tint that I chose to ignore.

The cookies, by the way, were excellent. 3 oatmeal cookies. They charged me 33 cents for them, which might have been a mistake on their part, but hey– they sold me green hot dogs, okay?

I headed back up to Milpitas, this time taking the freeway (880, as usual, having a traffic jam where the construction is, right before my exit). I pull in about 10 minutes late from my lunch break.

Frankly, I am just relieved to be out of the car and not stuck in traffic getting hot (today is a particularly warm and sunny January day) and pissed off (which goes without saying, really, except I said it).

More answers to the Ask Anything poll. You can still go ask a question there!

: What does your families (your’s and your spouse’s) familes think about the adult video business, and do you think it has had an effect on you and your spouse? (i.e. changed the way you perceived “the business”)

I suspect that my family does not approve, but in a way that makes them feel a little guilty for not approving, because it’s not at all like any of the moral guidelines I was raised by say that sex is wrong, or that looking at sex is wrong, or anything like that. But there is still a stigma to it. I’m pretty sure they won’t tell anyone who lives around them what he does.

To my face, they are supportive, but mostly non-committal. I’m critical enough of his business that they don’t need to “help.” They probably worry about me, or the kinds of people I’m associating with as a result, but to be perfectly honest, it’s just like any online business. I’ve never met any of his suppliers. I’ve never met any porn stars because of his business.

I don’t know how his family feels about it, honestly. Probably okay, but not great. Most of his family are more conservative than mine, at least out loud.

As for how it’s changed our perceptions of the business– a lot. John has certainly done his research, and the industry is a lot less dangerous and exploitative than I had originally thought. I’m still critical of it, of course, but that’s good– it keeps things level around here. John has voiced his criticisms for me when he felt I was being taken advantage of in various jobs and volunteer work.

It has also made him a lot more political, I must say. John is amusing this way– he would never have thought of taking any political action before, but now the business he’s in is an easy target for anti-free-speech parties, so he rigorously defends his livelihood however he can. Ultimately, it’s about protecting his job and business and income, although I think he’s glad to be acting towards the common good at the same time.

I still don’t watch porn, though.

: What are your favorite TV shows?

: If you could have sexual relations with any two celebrities at one time, who would they be?

Just for you on this one, how about the two Orlandos? Orlando Bloom + Orlando Jones? One for the sex, the other just for talk.
: If you could keep only one of your current posessions, what would it be and why?

Oooooh. Tough one. I’m going to discount the dog and the cat here, because they’re not possessions, and because you just don’t weigh the existence of a living being against that of an inanimate object.

There are very few physical objects in my possession that are truly irreplaceable. Even Isabel, my bass clarinet, could be replaced with a different instrument. Although it would not be the same as Isabel, it would still serve the function that Isabel serves.

My game books, notes, campaigns– they’re all replaceable. I haven’t built any worlds so extensively that I could never replace them.

My furniture consists of antiques, from my grandmother. I love them all very much. But yeah, I could replace them or live without them if I had to.

I would be very sad to lose all of my photographs, but life goes on. Those are irreplaceable, which is why I keep the negatives in a safe, fire/heat-retardant place. The same is true of my genealogy materials, though those, too, can be replaced.

My wedding ring is insured– I could lose it without fear. My books– oh, yes, I would weep for the signed copy of Blacks (Gwendolyn Brooks), and my college notebooks that have all my lernin’ in them.

However, there is a friend of mine who has been with me through my entire life. She’s been a partner, a pal, my deepest heart, my closest confidante. When I was scared or nervous, I would take it out on her, and she has been to Scotland, England, Germany, Switzerland, the Virgin Islands, the Bahamas, Jamaica, and every U.S. state that I’ve been to on her little passport. She’s been lost in a tornado, on a hundred and one camping trips, “borrowed” by a dog…. My favorite stuffed animal, received when I was about 5 years old, Bunny Foo Foo. I could not replace her, and losing her would be a real break to my heart, even now. 28 years old and I still have my favorite stuffed animal.

I’ll post a pic sometime later, because she’s special. I don’t know where her passport is, though.

m: I don’t remember. I was diddling around one day while looking for a job, and I stumbled on , tried it out, decided it wasn’t going to be a good fit, and meandered to where I could help out. I got more and more involved because I have a lot of web design experience and could help with the custom style requests a lot. So I did. And got points. And this thing is incredibly addictive, so I just kept going.

: If you could sleep with anyone in the world, past or present, real or fictional - who would you sleep with? Gah. Just one?

Seriously, most of my “anyone in the world” fantasies involve a deep conversation over tea. I think David Bowie, just off the set from Labyrinth would be okay. Or Spike– he’s fine. Yep. Umm….. I could actually make quite a list including the dead and/or fictional ones as well. Frankly, I wouldn’t mind shagging old Gandolf a time or….. just kidding.

For my “lesbian sex with anyone,” probably Yuna from FFX, Jessica Alba, or Geena Davis (but I’d rather just talk with her!)