Evil Plan
18-Nov-02
Ever notice how the most successful enterprises have a well-planned strategy? Well, true evil comes with a vision and mission statement, a plan, if you will, for crushing the will of the world and defeating all that is Good and Light.
Congratulations on being the creator of a new Evil Plan ™!
Your objective is simple: Widespread Misery.
Your motive is a little bit more complex: Revenge
Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first traumatize a diplomat. This will cause the world to bite their nails, alarmed by your arrival. Who is this sadistic fiend? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in battle armor?
Stage Two
Next, you must destroy Mt. Rushmore. This will all be done from a obsidian citadel, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will gibber like madmen, as countless hordes of mean english teachers hasten to do your every bidding.
Stage Three
Finally, you must send forth your opening of the seven seals, bringing about rivers that run red with blood. Your name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare interrupt your sentences. Everyone will bow before your cunning intelligence, and the world will have no choice but to whisper your name in fear.