Mortaine’s Blog

The assignment is this:
Write two passages about the same scene, in which something is happening, some activity is taking place. It helps if the two paragraphs are told from different points of view.

The first passage is all one sentence (one paragraph), preferably using “correct” grammar (no comma splices, run-ons, etc.). Try to make it at least 3/4 of a page, longer if possible.

The second passage can be multiple paragraphs, etc. But each sentence is no more than 7 words long.

Go do this, in your journal or elsewhere. Then go read what I wrote.

My exercise is called “A Dog’s World,” and it’s posted on my personal pages here. When we did this exercise in class, the tone and pace of the two pieces for most students resulted in a slower-paced mood for the single-sentence piece, and a faster-paced, more active mood for the 7-word-sentences piece.

As you can see, however, mine didn’t turn out that way. My long sentence has a number of comma splices, but it’s also much faster-paced, and told from a younger, more energetic point of view. The short-sentence piece starts out with a very slow, plodding tone, and it continues to have a kind of elderly, slightly worried tone to it throughout the piece.

I don’t know why that happened the way it did, but I think it’s neat. It’s been over two years since I wrote these two passages, and I still think they’re neat.
BTW: The passages are based on a household accident involving my two greyhounds– Hammer and Harry. Hammer was jumping around while we were all watching a movie, and he broke his toenail right off. I didn’t notice at first, but eventually saw the blood and had to take care of him, plus clean the carpet– all in the middle of The Abyss. It is Hammer’s voice in the first paragraph, and Harry’s in the second section. If you can’t figure out who “My Lady” and “She” refer to, then you don’t know me and my dogs very well.
Harry passed away in February of last year. Hammer is still with us, our big, bouncy, brindle boy.

Whoo hoo!!! I did it! I beat Yunalesca in Final Fantasy X!!! About a month ago, I stopped playing because I knew she was a tough one to fight, and I also knew I didn’t have time to think of strategy.

Well, last night, I decided on my strategy– go out and gain new experience, get Yuna (the character– Yunalesca is a monster) up to where she can cast Holy, which does holy damage, and then go back.

I did that, fought Yunalesca, and beat her, and pretty quick, too. Sure, there was a moment or two that were quite worrisome– when Auron got KO’d in the last few rounds, for example. But I stuck with my plan and we got her!!!

Brian says I have about 3 hours left of game time at this point, but of course that varies, usually by how long I spend wandering around trying to figure stuff out.

Ken and I were talking about this game about a month ago, and Ken said he didn’t want the story to end, and he’s right– the story is very manipulative of the player’s emotions– you fall a little bit in love with Yuna, you want to save her, and you don’t ever want to let her go.

Ken bought a Yuna doll. I would make some sort of wisecrack here, but I got my hair cut like hers, so I’d better just keep my mouth shut.