Mortaine’s Blog

We went rafting again yesterday– a 1-day trip this time. Left Friday night, drove up to the stie, and camped overnight, just the 2 of us. In the morning, our friends arrived. In all, there were 10 of us– 5 couples– in our little group (there were more rafters, of course). I didn’t know some of the other folks that well, but we had a good time anyway.

It was interesting to notice that each of the couples consisted of an introvert and an extrovert, and that they worked well together. I think maybe that’s one of the secrets of success in marriage– you have to match your personality (introvert or extrovert) with someone who is opposite you. If you’re very strongly an extrovert, like my friend Pradeep, then your perfect match (Jeanette) is a strong introvert. If you’re a weak extrovert, meaning you’re closer to the “middle” on the intro/extro scale, then you’re best suited with a weak introvert, someone who isn’t entirely an introvert, but is more of an introvert than an extrovert.

John & I are well matched– I’m an extrovert with some introvert tendencies, and he’s an introvert with some extrovert tendencies. When I was younger, I was definitely an introvert– even on family vacations I would rather curl up with a notebook and write stories than be involved in what other people were doing. That wasn’t just annoyance at my family, either, because it was pretty much my favorite vacation; settle down with a good book. In fact, that’s a pretty good vacation for me now, except that the “good books” I bring along are books for school or work, and I just don’t get inspired to read them when I’m in Las Vegas or on vacation.

It’s also interesting to read livejournal entries and learn about the people in them, whether they’re introverts or extroverts. I mean, journalling is a pretty introverted thing to do– a journal is a private thing that people use to express themselves and their thoughts and feelings.

But posting it on the web is a major exposure, and something that most introverts are not comfortable doing. So, in that sense, it’s an extrovert’s activity.

I suspect that the types of entries in the journals is the real clue as to whether or not someone is an introvert or an extrovert. When I write my journal entries, I write them in clear English, with few misspellings and typos, and using fairly correct grammar. I write as if I am writing to someone, and in a way, I am. Actually, when I write my journal entries, I write them as if my fellow LJ journaller, satanstoystore, is going to read them, because he’s the most consistent reader of my journal so far. Even though I’ve never met him, I feel comfortable expressing my thoughts on life and the universe in general as if I were writing to him.

One thing that’s a real clue for me that someone is either an introvert, or is expressing their introvert tendencies in their livejournal: writing so directly to a person that it’s unclear what happened. I see this frequently in LJ entries that follow some really big or intense event in a relationship. The LJ user enters his or her thoughts on the event, sometimes directing those thoughts to their friend (or former friend, as the case may be), and sometimes just expressing that they’re upset by something, but not giving too many details about it.

This is a sign, to me, that that person is feeling vulnerable and wants to keep some thoughts and feelings private, but still wants to express something about this intense experience that they had. I think that, in such cases, the user should either (a) mark that journal entry private, or (b) decide not to care if other people can read what’s in their hearts, and write away! I think some people decide not to put as much in because they are torn between expressing themselves and sharing everything with the whole world. I think that, if you’re feeling something so intense, that makes you feel so vulnerable, that you should put it in your journal and mark it private. A week or two later, go back, re-read your private entry, and decide if you’re ready to express those thoughts publicly. If so, then mark the entry public and let people come and see what’s going through your mind, or what happened. In that way, you can still express yourself, and you can do so on the public forum that is livejournal, but without feeling quite so vulnerable and exposed.